Baggy is seriously upset!

Well it's 8.30pm on Thursday in the UK and Baggy has just tried to post her latest blog "Sometimes, just sometimes" on Facebook. They have blocked it/her! Needless to say Hormonal Hannah is really upset about this and is having a mini meltdown over it. Baggy is shaky and crying and getting close to a panic attack over it.

The first comment said it was blocked because it was spam.

The second that it was blocked because it was a "dangerous" link.

Now it says that the content has been reported as "abusive".

Clever Bird is going to post this then see if she can share it on FB to ascertain whether it is just one day's blog that is now blocked, or the whole blog. She supposes she's been lucky to have written it for over a year without at least one "hater" crawling out of the woodwork or wherever they live. Hopefully normal service will be resumed shortly if Creative Clara can persuade Baggy Body to put her head back above the parapet.........

Sometimes, just sometimes......

It took all Baggy's strength to drag Hormonal Hannah out of bed this morning! Baggy woke at 11.00am when her number one furry called to check that she was okay - he had been working for nine hours by that point! Tempted as she was to go straight back to sleep and avoid the day, Furry Mama insisted (chivvied along by Bracket kat), that she get up and feed everyone. The Domestic Goddess made her a cup of tea and she retired to the sofa, still in her dressing gown. Hormonal Hannah just wanted to cry. Everything seemed too much. But Furry Mama took charge, as she doesn't want a depressed German Shepherd on her hands as well, so she made Baggy get showered and dressed. Furry Mama took charge of the direction of the walk today. She decided to do the pleasant 45-minute loop around fields and over the water meadows. Minty Mutt was very happy to be out. Baggy sloped along behind him staring at the ground and feeling sorry for herself.

Out of the corner of her eye, Archaeology Annie spotted a Mesolithic "spearhead" in the wet mud. She picked it up, then she spotted a "hammer". They were very muddy, she tried to wipe them clean and got gunk all over Baggy's hands. Minty Mutt carried on without her. Annie saw a "scraper". Minty came back to find out what was going on. Furry Mama dragged Annie onward. Mint set off again. Clever Bird suggested that Annie put the flint tools into a doggy doo-doo bag so that she didn't get more dirt on Baggy's hands and clothes. Just as well as when they reached the stile, Baggy had to jet propel Mint's bottom over it.

The Domestic Goddess decided to pop into the farm shop on the way past to buy some bread. Furry Mama tied Mint up outside. Baggy walked into the shop, swinging the flint tools in the doo-doo bag in her left hand. Clever Bird wondered why a couple of women were gawping at her, mouths hanging open. She wandered over to the bread stand - there was none left. Baggy left the shop. She heard a clammering of female gossiping voices. Furry Mama calmed Minty down who thought he'd been deserted forever and was throwing himself on his back, whimpering and wagging his tail. She reconnected his lead and they set off home. It was only as Baggy put the doo-doo bag full of Annie's finds on the floor so that she could unlock the front door, that it occurred to her what Clever Bird had done wrong. Well that'll be all round the village by now...........

The black cloud looms.

Well at least Clever Bird is beginning to recognise the black cloud looming before it actually arrives over her (just). Sleeping too much, feeling overwhelmed, not wanting to leave the house, not even wanting to get dressed, in fact struggling to do anything. This morning she was still in her dressing gown at noon. Minty Mutt was looking at Furry Mama beseechingly through twitching eyebrows, but Baggy just didn't want to move from the sofa. When Clever Bird pointed out to Baggy that this was Hormonal Hannah being over attention seeking once again and that it really wasn't fair on Minty Mutt, Baggy decided to have a shower and make an effort. The moment she was dressed Minty leapt up, so Furry Mama persuaded Baggy to go out. Very early in the walk they met a four-month old British bull dog, he was absolutely adorable. A cuddle with him cheered Baggy up no end.

Furry Mama let Minty choose the route, as Baggy yacked to her number one furry on the phone. The mutt decided that they should do the walk through Assington thickets - quite a long one. But Furry Mama realised that Hormonal Hannah had made her forget to give Minty his medicine. As Baggy yacked to Calum, Mint got further and further behind her. They walked up the long track to the thickets and Baggy turned left, intending to do a loop back to the house which takes about forty-five minutes. She turned round and Minty was looking at her and not moving. "You okay Minty?"
"Not really Mum".
"Do you want to go back?"
"Yes please".
So they headed back the way they'd come. Furry Mama half expected him to turn left when they got back to the road and do their longer water meadow walk, but he chose the shortest route home. Baggy didn't mind as she didn't feel great either.

Furry Mama gave Mint his magic medicine in a cup of tea. He drank it and then fell asleep on the rug. Baggy was inclined to go back to bed herself, but Clever Bird wouldn't let her. Instead Creative Clara packed all her shop merchandise and added a few new items to her shop as it suddenly occurred to Clever Bird that if they're moving house on Saturday, her stock needs to go with her. At least keeping Baggy busy all day has vaguely kept the cloud at bay..........

Taking it easy.

Last night Baggy possibly had the longest amount of sleep without waking up and having to get up, she's had - ever. Now this is probably perfectly normal for most of you bloggees, but it's unheard of for Baggy; seven whole hours without waking up! She only woke up then because Minty Mutt was barking his head off and Furry Mama went down to check what was up with him. As it was only 5.30am she went back to bed and immediately fell asleep. Further barking woke her at 10.00am! As she's usually up every two hours, she feels miles better today. She just about had time to chivvy The Domestic Goddess into action to tidy up the house a bit, so that it didn't look too awful when Baggy's physiotherapist arrived at noon.

Baggy has had physio. on and off for four years now and until her last visit six weeks ago, had never progressed beyond the most fundamental inner core exercise, thanks to Lawrence-the-durmoid-cyst always having been in the way. But last time she was given a new exercise and as she's almost mastered it, today she got an advanced exercise. Well Creative Clara says, "advanced", but that's only an advance on the most basic exercise. She has moved to stage two, of about ten, but Baggy is thrilled! She is finally beginning to get some inner strength back! The physiotherapist was a little taken aback when she found out everything that Baggy is doing at present. She mentioned that Baggy's body was probably telling her it needed a break, especially when Clever Bird mentioned the A&E trip on her birthday. She did think it sounded like Baggy's gall bladder that caused the drama, and she also thought Clever Bird was correct and the cause was all the fat she ate that day, followed by the "monster" cake. The good news was she didn't think Baggy needed to visit the doctor about it unless it happened again. So Baggy felt good after her visit and decided to listen to Hormonal Hannah who wanted a break form all the stress of moving.

Clever Bird was going to persuade Calum to put off the move for another week or so, but actually she's now decided that they should stick with this weekend. She may change her mind again, but Baggy is quite excited. So she let Creative Clara have the rest of the day. She spent it on the internet researching more of her auction buy. She has now added to the tally of lovely things: an eighteenth-century jelly glass, a nineteenth-century rummer glass, an antique wooden Beijing opera mask, and two cute vintage vases. It's a proper little treasure trove......

Stressed again.

Creative Clara would like to apologise for not blogging yesterday, but she got so excited about her auction buy for her Etsy shop that she ran out of day. She's almost finished cataloguing and valuing everything and cannot believe what a good buy she got. Now she needs to get it all photographed and copy written for each product, then she can set it up in her shop. It's going to take a while. It's a shame she'll miss the Christmas market, but Baggy has too much else to do to get it sorted that quickly. She'll be keeping the portrait miniature for her own collection and probably the Chelsea porcelain birds of paradise, which she presumes must be fake, as if they're not, that one item is worth hundreds of pounds. Clara is not an expert in china, although she's reasonably knowledgeable about art deco, which she collects, but she's pretty sure the little piece isn't nearly three hundred years old, and surely if it was Chelsea, the auction house would have spotted it. Mind you they didn't spot the portrait miniature, so who knows? They also didn't spot the very rare crested perfume bottle from 1906 that's also worth over a hundred pounds! Baggy's biggest problem is that Hormonal Hannah has already got very attached to most of the items and doesn't really want Clara to sell them! Not the plan!

Today, Baggy was a "lady wot lunches". She met one of her closest friends for a catch-up. It was lovely to see her and give her a cuddle, as she's had a bit of a sad time recently. Baggy tried to be sensible and ordered a tomato tart tatin and salad, ignoring the fish and chips, the burger and chips and the ham, egg and chips, despite the (literally) freezing weather outside. But it was a good choice - it was absolutely delicious. Then she blew it by having chocolate brownie with warm chocolate sauce and rum and raisin ice cream. Ah well, it's nearly Christmas. Then Grotty Groom made Hormonal Hannah back off and got Baggy to take her to see the Boys.

While she was cuddling and grooming The Boy Wessles, it finally occurred to Clever Bird just how stressed Baggy is once more. Normally as soon as Grotty is with the horses, she forgets everything else. Not today. Baggy's brain would not switch off. Freda Fretter was getting her in a proper flap about moving. In theory this weekend is moving day, but now it's arrived, Hannah is not sure she's ready - literally, or mentally. Perhaps that's why The Domestic Goddess has gone from spending nearly every day packing things up, to not having packed a thing for over two weeks! But it's silly panicking when the fact is they are in the very fortunate position that they could just move back if needs be. Plus as Clever Bird keeps reminding Hannah, all they really need to "pack" now are the furries, Clara's Realuv products and more clothes. Everything else is already there! And if it isn't, they can easily come back and get it, it is after all only ninety minutes away. Grotty will be back to see the horses anyway. Baggy has various appointments and really should see the doctor. And most importantly, Creative Clara has a holiday cottage business to set up. Plus Calum will be back every week to go to work, so can easily take more bits over. All the furniture that still needs to move can move at any time, so no need to stress! Hold that thought Baggy..........

Brilliant day!!!!!

Following on from the "they shouldn't be allowed out" theme of yesterday, Baggy and Calum were let out once again today! First stop of the day: Take Billy Bob camper van back to where he came from to be pampered. He needs a couple of little things fixed - like actually having some heating that works! - and a bit of a service. Next stop: The supermarket to buy some food for the week. This is when it started to go a little pear-shaped. Calum insisted that they need a Christmas tree. They already have one, but to be fair, it is little and the new house is quite big. Seven-foot Christmas tree picked up along with the food. Sigh.

Food shoved in the car, Calum insisted that they went into the "bargain" shop next door to look at the reindeers! One snowman, two reindeers, a dancing dog, Christmas tree lights, Christmas crackers, Christmas tree flashing reindeer lights and some mad baubles later, they got back in the car.

All of these will now require transporting to the other house along with the million and one other things that still need to go. Hmmmm.

Home, furries fed lunch. Shopping unpacked. Calum and Baggy fed lunch, an over-excited Calum decided that they should go to the auction to see if they'd won anything. Baggy's back was so bad by now that she could barely move, but when Clever Bird said that Baggy needed to rest, Calum's face was a very sad little furry-look. Baggy struggled up. They went to the auction with Clever Bird muttering, "We haven't had a text so we haven't won anything". Wrong again Clever Bird.
"You've won three lots".
"Oh, which ones?"
"Dining chairs, a necklace, two boxes with pictures and advertising tins in".
"Can I ask what the ones we lost went for?" asked Clever Bird then rapidly wished she hadn't when she realised they had missed out on all three by between £2 and £10. But actually, it's as well, as knowing Calum and Baggy they'd have got into a bidding war, and in any case they got the three lots that they really needed/wanted.

A set of six dining chairs for the holiday cottage dining table. Two boxes of brilliant stuff for Creative Clara's Etsy shop. A stunning necklace that will be Baggy's Christmas present from Calum, that she adores. Baggy was sad that she didn't get the stunning picture she loved, but they met the chap who did and Hormonal Hannah was happy it was going to a loving home.

This evening Creative Clara has started to go through her boxes of bits for her shop. Clever Bird didn't really look too closely at them before she put in a high bid, quite a bit over the top estimate. That was because she knew that there were more than enough good things in there for her shop and a quick totting up of the souvenir items and advertising tins meant that she knew there was a good profit to be made.

She went through the thirty little tins first. Looked at the slightly creepy, French hand-carved wooden mask, spotted a hand-blown vase, a Wedgwood bowl, a Greek(?) lidded dish. She was about to start unwrapping all the china when she decided to list the three miniature pictures which were described first in the catalogue listing. She had dismissed these as worthless at the viewing as it was everything else that Clara was interested in, and these appeared to be repro. or nothing special. Firstly a hand-carved cork picture; quite well done, but with a damaged frame. Secondly a repro oil. Thirdly a print in a repro frame. Now bloggees, hold a thought while you read this, "Baggy has collected portrait miniatures and old hand-coloured prints for thirty years, so she is reasonably knowledgeable about them". Thought held? Right. So first Clara looks at the cork picture - it is very well executed and the frame just needs re-taping. Secondly the repro oil painting, that's stapled to a modern wooden frame. Closer inspection has her wondering if actually it is really an oil, but she's no expert, all she does know is that it's definitely not printed and it's signed and dated. The signature is illegible but it's dated 1862. More research required. The third picture, well!! Yes Baggy collects portrait miniatures, all painted on ivory in the late-eighteenth and early-nineteenth centuries. She doesn't have many as they are few and far between and expensive. She had glanced at the picture in the box. It is a seriously well executed painting in a repro. looking frame. The Lot estimate was £40-£60, so no way could it be an original. This evening she looked at it under a light and began to wonder. Then she got a glass on it - Baggy's heart rate shot up. It appears to be an original. "It can't be", muttered Clever Bird. She had a look at the repro. frame - it too appears to be original.

"Calum look at this". He looked. He used a glass. "The back is sealed with wax".
"Ooooo, so it is. It hasn't been opened either".
More light required. Baggy looked again. Now she will need to have a better look in daylight, but she is currently eighty-percent certain that it is an original portrait miniature painted on either ivory or possibly glass. And it is superb AND it is signed! Baggy's reference books are at the other house, so she can't do much more research at present, but it would seem that this one picture will be worth at least five times what she paid for the whole Lot! Yep, Baggy loves auctions! Back to the box to see what else is hidden in there........

Baggy should not be allowed out!

Baggy had her lovely Fat Club meeting today. She didn't go last week as she was organising Grotty Groom to take the horses away for their holiday. Freda Fretter made Baggy get on the scales this morning before she left the house, just so she didn't get too much of a shock. It was all fine. Baggy is still within her target weight in spite of giving in to the call of the pancakes for the last two nights.

When she got home Creative Clara checked out her shop. She had another order.

This cute little dragonfly brooch is now flying off to Ukraine! Baggy has a regular bloggee in Ukraine, so Clever Bird was wondering if it was the same person! Her order two days ago, for this little paper weight went to Niagra Falls! She also has a regular bloggee (actually a few bloggees) in Canada. Clara loves being international.

Clara packed up the brooch and did her "bounce test" with the parcel. When Calum got home she whisked him straight off to the Post Office in the next village. Hormonal Hannah persuaded him (without difficulty) that they should grab a coffee and a bite of lunch in the village café. Baggy decided to try to be vaguely sensible and ordered a baby goat's cheese and what looked like mushroom, quiche with salad. When she took a mouthful she realised that the mushrooms were actually red onions that appeared to be pickled. So it wasn't really a quiche at all! It was actually a pastry flan with pickled red onions in it and a tiny sliver of goat's cheese on top. Not an egg, or any other cheese in sight. Hannah was most disappointed, especially when she watched Calum tucking into a lovely ham and cheese Panini. Clever Bird was muttering to her, "It's one thing eating loads of 'syns' when you are loving it, but when you are not enjoying it at all, that's just silly!" Baggy decided Clever Bird was right and left over half of it. Apart from not tasting very nice, the tart was also playing havoc with Baggy's "Geographic tongue" (look it up bloggees - not pretty!), and the tip of her tongue was burning.

"I really wish I hadn't ordered that," said Baggy to Calum, "it serves me right for not checking what was in it. My tongue hurts. Does it look okay?" she asked as she stuck it out at Calum.
"Well, it looks like the Grand Canyon".
"What? What do you mean?"
"You have a canyon down the middle of it?"
"WTF?"
"Go to the loo and look in the mirror".
Assuming that he was joking, Baggy toddled off to the loo. She stuck her tongue out at the mirror.
"Arghhhhhhhh!"
Sure enough there was a massive canyon in the middle of her tongue; red and raw! It looked as though it was splitting down the middle. Baggy prodded it gingerly with her finger. Much to Freda Fretters relief, it didn't promptly split in half and it didn't seem to hurt too much.
Baggy went back to Calum. Calum took one look at the expression on Baggy's face and burst out laughing.
"Should I be worried?"
"No, it's just because you're poorly".
"But it looks terrible. Like my tongue is going to split".
Chuckles.
"It's not funny".
"It is".
"So I don't need to go to hospital?"
"No. It's a sign you're poorly - just dehydrated."
"You're sure?"
"Yes. It's fine".
Hissing noises.
"I am NOT a snake".
Chuckles.
"You're 100% certain it's not serious? How do you know these things?"
"I used to work as a nurse remember?"
"Okay".
Forked tongue gesturing.
Baggy decided to ignore him and order Victoria Sponge cake to cheer herself up.

On the way home they popped into the auction viewing so that Creative Clara could see whether there were any nice lots for her shop. There were a couple, so she put in commission bids for them - much safer than "live" bidding. Then they spotted some perfect chairs for the holiday cottage dining table - another bid. Then Calum fell in love with a "George and the Dragon" - another bid, bearing in mind that it was "thrown in" with a set of cutlery. By now Baggy felt quite poorly. Too much heat (and she was wearing a sheepskin coat), caffeine shakes, sugar collapse and a stomach ache from the red onions - not to mention a still "burning" tongue. Calum was still looking at things.
"Please can we go now?"
"Okay". No sign of movement. Sigh. Baggy wandered over to the jewellery section. Clara spotted a very Bohemian necklace.
"Please could I see Lot 222?" Clara put it round Baggy's neck. She wandered off and looked in the mirror. It was gorgeous and went perfectly with her outfit.
"This is the thing I hate about auctions, I just want to buy this now", said Baggy to the auctioneer - another bid.

"Right, Calum, this is getting silly, we really should leave now, and I feel pretty rubbish".
"Coming".
They headed out of the room and were just about to go downstairs when Clara spotted a picture on the stairway.
"Wow, look at that, it's gorgeous".
"It is nice, but where would we put it?"
"I don't care, I love it. Can we put a bid in? No sorry, we mustn't I know. Let's go".
"How much do you love it?"
"Well..........."
"Ah go for it. You only live once." - another bid.

Tomorrow could be interesting! Last time they put bids in they didn't win any of them. The time before that they won all of them. Exciting - but Calum and Baggy really shouldn't be allowed out, but Cal's right and Baggy needs no persuading, you do only live once.....

Sod it!

No white sparkly stuff this morning, just another cold, but gloriously sunny day for Furry Mama to go out with Minty Mutt.

Baggy did have to tell Hormonal Hannah where to go though, before Baggy would head out. Even though Baggy's cold didn't seem quite as bad this morning, (possibly something to do with the ridiculous amount of Vick's vapour rub that Clever Bird plastered on her chest last night), she still felt rubbish. But her sprits lifted as she watched Minty Mutt bouncing about like a little puppy and Creative Clara was mesmerised by the beautiful light.

Clara would have taken more photos, had her phone not been sulking! It insists that it has no storage space left to take photos, even though it recognises that there is an empty sim card available for storage and is set to put all new photos and videos on it! So why won't it then bloggees? It is driving Clever Bird nuts. Psychic Ploppo is sure that it's because the phone is upset that Baggy has somehow broken its screen. She's tried to explain to it that it needs to work properly, or a broken screen will be the least of its worries, but it doesn't seem to understand.

It did make Baggy feel a little better being out with Furry Mama, but by the time she got back to the house her nose was once again running well enough, to compete in the London Marathon. So her muttered lists for the day haven't really materialised. The sitting room looks like a bomb's hit it, because The Domestic Goddess hasn't yet put away any of the things from the weekend in Billy Bob.
"Right, make a cup of tea, blow Baggy's nose, unload the washing machine, blow Baggy's nose, hang up the washing, blow Baggy's nose, cuddle the cats, blow Baggy's nose, start putting things away, get distracted, blow Baggy's nose..."
"Right, sod it, make a cup of tea, blow Baggy's nose, watch a Christmas film on telly and relax".............

Mutter and repeat, mutter and repeat.......

At silly o'clock this morning when Calum left for work, the world was white and crisp and sparkly. As Dodgy Truck is still in the garage waiting for parts to arrive from America, he asked Baggy which car he should take. "Well, you'd best take Billy Bob". He came back up later to kiss Baggy goodbye. "Well, I'd best get off early as I need to scrape Billy Bob".
Clever Bird woke up a bit more.
"Urrrrm, I forgot Billy Bob has no heating, perhaps you'd better take Brucie Fiat, as I'm not really going anywhere much".
"Okay thanks."
Baggy went back to sleep as it was 6.15am. The world was still white and crisp and sparkly when Furry Mama headed out with Minty Mutt for his first walk in six days. As she fought her way past the dustbin that The Domestic Goddess had put in front of the gate, preventing anyone from getting in or out, Clever Bird realised that the bins aren't emptied until tomorrow. Baggy swore as she got the dustbin stuck on the hedge. Minty squeezed past.

Then Freda Fretter went into a total meltdown, Billy Bob had been stolen, he wasn't there. Baggy's heart rate shot up. It took a few seconds for Clever Bird to point out that although Billy Bob wasn't there, Brucie Fiat was! Sigh!

Furry Mama and Minty set off on their walk. Baggy struggled to keep up with Mint who was rather excited to be out, as although their lovely neighbours look after the house and furries if Baggy is away, they find Mint a bit too much to walk! Baggy phoned Calum.
"I thought Billy Bob had been stolen."
"Didn't you see Brucie?"
"Yes, I was staring at him as I thought it. Why did you take Billy Bob? Did he defrost with no heat?"
"Eventually, but I suddenly realised it wasn't fair you driving him in this weather when you are so poorly with that cough and cold".
One of many reasons why Baggy is so lucky to have her number one furry.

Baggy struggled to get her breath as the icy air got into Furry Mama's lungs, but it was a spectacularly beautiful morning. (No bloggees Creative Clara did not touch up that sky colour!)

When they got back, Clever Bird had a bit of a funny moment, when she realised the lengths that Hormonal Hannah has been driving Baggy to. Baggy has always chatted to herself. She spends way too much time on her own, or at least without humans, so she needs someone to talk to. She also has the telly on all the time for the same reason, she needs to hear human voices. But Clever Bird suddenly realised that Baggy is constantly "listing" out loud.
"So, I'll feed the furries, have a shower, get dressed and take Minty Mutt out".
"Right, I'll make a cup of tea, put the washing on then do the washing up".
"Okay, I'll do my blog, check my Etsy shop, then have some lunch".
It's constant, repetitive wittering, out loud. The list is repeated:
"So, I'll have a shower, get dressed and take Minty Mutt out".
"So I'll get dressed and take Minty Mutt out" etc etc.

But if Baggy doesn't do this, Hormonal Hannah makes her forget. Yes, okay bloggees, she's not likely to forget to get dressed. But she has boiled the kettle about six times today, but only remembered once to make a cup of tea.  The washing up has been done by The Goddess, but not one load of washing has gone on yet. It is now 2.40pm and no food has past Baggy's lips since last night.
"Right publish Blog, check Etsy shop, make a cup of tea"...............

Yee-hah!!!!!!

Baggy is back! Did you miss her bloggees? Well that's a little harsh, she missed you! But Hormonal Hannah in particular, benefitted from Clever Bird's decision that the last four days would be technology free. Well almost, anyway. Creative Clara did take her camera, but no phone, no laptop, no telly. It was a little odd to begin with, but actually was a brilliant decision. Four days away from all the stresses and strains and the pressure that Baggy has been putting on herself. Four days that Grotty Groom and Calum spent with each other, their beautiful horses and some other lovely people and their equines, at the brilliant Ashen Equestrian Centre. It all started on Friday. Becky, the mastermind behind Ashen, was coming to pick up Wesley and Joey at 2.00pm. Calum and Baggy had decided to really go back to basics, and unlike last July, when they stayed in a B&B, they were staying in Billy Bob Jalopy camper van. This required him to be packed, with not just their stuff, but with all the Boys' things too, as there wouldn't be the capacity for it all in the horsebox. Bearing in mind that this was Clever Bird packing, that was a LOT of stuff. So they were ready to load the horses exactly on time, or to put it another way, by the skin of their teeth!

The Boy Wessles did his usual, "Oh heck, really, you want me to get in that little box! Why? Where am I going? Is Joey coming?" Freda Fretter had removed Grotty from the scene, as they just make everything worse, panicking that Wesley won't load, or will hurt himself in the process. It was fine, both horses were on. Grotty travelled with Becky in the horsebox. Calum came behind in Billy Bob. Wesley travelled like a dream, munching his hay and looking out of the window. Joey travelled like a nightmare, ignoring his own hay, trying to eat Wessles' (hay and him) and kicking the living daylights out of the horsebox, when he failed at both. Grotty watched all of this on the live CCTV in the cab, with visions of Joey's hoof coming through the box into the back of her seat, every time he kicked. When Becky opened the doors at the other end, Joey looked as if he was standing under a shower he had sweated up so much and clearly some of the kicking was because he'd slipped in the sweat on the floor under him. But when they both recognised where they were, having enjoyed their stay at Ashen in July, they were very happy to settle in their stables with a haynet. A relieved Hormonal Hannah was happy to unpack their tons of stuff and set Billy Bob up for the night. The Domestic Goddess had excelled herself and pre-made Calum and Baggy a healthy spaghetti bolognaise for their supper. It was so dark by 6.00pm that it felt like 10.00pm, so pretty early, with no telly or computers to amuse them, and feeling completely exhausted, they settled down for the night at 8.00pm!

It was freezing! Literally. But Calum and Baggy were snug as bugs in rugs under two duvets. They also had a little electric fan heater for emergency heat. It was very cosy (in more ways than one). Even the "rock-and-roll" bed was comfy with the two memory-foam toppers that Clever Bird bought, on top of it. Grotty's first lesson with Wesley was at 9.00am. Baggy wasn't too happy when the alarm went off at 7.00am. Clever Bird soon understood why Gypsies keep their caravans so immaculately and Calum does the same with his lorry - when you are living in a tiny space, it is so important. The Domestic Goddess has not yet acquired this skill! Pandemonium ensued as Grotty tried to get organised!

By the time Grotty and Wesley were ready, Baggy was a nervous wreck. Wesley wasn't far behind when he realised that he had to leave Joey behind in his stable and go into the arena. Grotty walked him around in-hand for a few minutes while they both tried to relax, with Wesley constantly doing his girly whinny to Joey! Against her better judgement Grotty decided to get on a rather wired Wesley. Clever Bird had entirely forgotten that she was told last time, NOT to do this, but Grotty thought she was doing the right thing. Wesley carried on calling to Joey. Baggy made Grotty grab hold of neck strap, R-stor, mane and anything else she thought might keep her in the saddle if Wesley took off.

She suddenly realised that she was being ridiculous. Yes she was terrified, but she needed to relax him. Becky asked if Grotty wished to dismount. Grotty didn't. It soon became clear that Becky has developed her classical training to another level, and that they would be riding differently to last time they were at Ashen E.C. They had a lovely lesson for an hour, finding Grotty's position, directly over Wesley's centre of balance, by floating over his back, hands high on his neck. All rather technical, so Creative Clara won't go into details, but Baggy and Wesley were soon relaxed. Exhausted both mentally and physically, but relaxed. Becky hopped on Wessles too for a while and showed him how it was done, so that Grotty would find it a little easier when she got back on. Wesley was a superstar.

A couple of hours later it was Calum and Joey's turn. Due to the house move, Baggy being in hospital, Calum being tired and life taking over, Calum had not ridden Joey for over two months (if not three). So it could have gone rather wrong. It didn't, but they were both exhausted. Joey didn't understand what was being asked of him, as the poor sausage has never had one consistent style of training, but he and Calum tried really hard to get it. Becky hopped on. Joey tried, but he nearly finished her off he was so unsure of what to do. Joey was better at understanding when Cal got back on, and they both did really well, but the front blocks on Joey's saddle made it hard to rise to the trot. Becky described how Joey was going, as being like an articulated lorry - bending in the middle. She asked Calum what kind of lorry was solid. "Rigids", said Calum. Giggles followed. "Right, well I need to make you rigid then Calum". Baggy piped up with, "You have my permission to make my husband rigid if you need to."
"Well being floppy means that he'll definitely feel the benefit of being rigid". Guffaws.

But Joey was such a good lad and Cal was delighted to be back on board. Grotty and Calum learned just as much from watching the other lessons and from the feedback videos and discussion. Baggy began to feel vaguely human again for the first time in days. Considering that on Thursday evening, Hormonal Hannah was thinking up excuses for Baggy to cancel the trip, she had a brilliant first day. Grotty just loved being with her horse, without any other pressure. She even enjoyed mucking out. That evening after Calum had removed the front blocks from his saddle, Calum and Baggy went into the local town with two other ladies from the course and had a brilliant evening. Baggy's diet went totally to pot. Copious amounts of wine drunk, plus delicious food and banoffee pie! Lovely! Once the horses were tucked up for the night, Baggy and Calum decided to do the same. Cal had to be up really early, as Becky had decided that Joey needed a little extra tuition and was riding him at 8.00am. He was going to get up at 6.30am. He actually got up at 5.15am! Baggy didn't. In fact, she swore at his alarm and went back to sleep again at 6.30am. She woke to the sound of large Irish Draught hooves plodding past Billy Bob. Flat-out panic ensued as Grotty was riding at 9.45am. She needn't have worried, Calum had mucked out both horses, so all she needed to do was get herself and Wesley organised.

Wesley still called to Joey, but was a lot more relaxed on Sunday than he had been on Saturday, that is until the cold wind went up his nostrils. But Grotty was more confident. There was much practising of floating and adjusting Wesley's and Baggy's balance points. It went really well. Baggy had no idea what peculiar faces Grotty and Wesley pull when they are trying to concentrate!

Once the walk was getting there, it was time to up the pace and try the same hovering, balancing, centreing technique in trot. Baggy's pony tail joined in with Wesley's tail!

Very happy Wesley, and a totally delighted Grotty went back to watch everyone else for the rest of the morning. Cal and Joey (who had a very peculiar look on his face when he saw the saddle for the second time that day) were on at noon.

After Becky's morning schooling, Joey was a little concerned about how hard he might need to work, but looked like a different horse.

Calum was delighted because he was so light and easy to ride; really keen and willing to go forward. Once Joey realised that he was doing it right, he started to enjoy himself too.

Very happy Calum. Tired Joey.

On Sunday afternoon there was a group session where everyone could ride together. Baggy was very inclined to duck out. At the lunchtime debrief Becky effectively gave her the okay to do just that. Which meant that Grotty instantly decided that whether Baggy liked it or not, she was riding. Calum, Grotty and one other rider went back into the school. Clever Bird forgot the camera. Joey couldn't believe it! It went well, but the temperature had dropped dramatically! Calum and Baggy ate heartily that night, at the same pub as the night before. Baggy was totally chilled!

Next morning (Monday), Baggy was awake at 5.00am! And raring to go. Cal was awake too, so The Goddess made tea and fried egg sandwiches. (None of Hormonal Hannah's nonsense of keeping Baggy in bed until noon!) Grotty's last lesson was brilliant. She loved every second of it. After practising what they had done previously in walk and trot......

they started to learn "shoulder-in". A lateral manoeuvre that Baggy has never done before. Okay, it wasn't even close to perfect and it wasn't pretty, but Grotty was chuffed to little mint balls that they had started on something totally new.

Grotty needs to figure it out, because Wesley was so willing.....

After big stretches......

trotting resumed.

Grotty was so happy to be with her gorgeous Boy!

Calum's final lesson on a tired Joey was even more successful, even though Calum's legs were like iron. Not only did they also do shoulder-in, but Calum got all competitive and did it in trot as well as walk!!

Very chuffed partnership!

It was such a brilliant break. Both Calum and Baggy benefitted from it no end and the horses certainly did! As you can tell, a lot of photos were taken - over 2,000 in all! Yep, Clara was tempted to put the lot in. Sorry bloggees, but be grateful she resisted that at least! Baggy's back and in a very happy place thanks to her break. They all can't wait to go back sometime next year..........