Spent an afternoon with the Tudors.

Baggy and Calum have spent the afternoon at Kentwell Hall, Long Melford, celebrating May Day with the Tudors. It has been a lovely, if somewhat exhausting afternoon. The weather, unlike the forecast, has been amazing. Creative Clara wanted to go to get a bit more information for her novel. The reassuring, but also rather weird thing, is that her "imagination", seems to be historically accurate. Clever Bird thinks that Psychic Ploppo really has been helping Clara write!

Bearing in mind that Calum and Furry Mama took Minty Mutt for a decent walk before heading to Kentwell, they have done a huge amount of walking today. With luck, enough for Baggy to have worn off the massive piece of Victoria Sponge Cake that she demolished in the tea room. So much for being totally on her diet this week.

 Calum assisted the Tudors to erect their May Pole, just in time for the women and girls, to have a bit of a dance around it.

The musicians played throughout, extremely well, and the whole thing was rather moving. It was odd for Calum and Lady Eadwynn to be spectators, rather than reenacators but it was interesting to be a paying member of the public. They did get their money's worth. Lovely day. Now Baggy just has to persuade The Domestic Goddess to muster up some energy to cook supper...........

Second operation of the week today!

Calum must have felt that he was being left out of the "sympathy after an operation", loop! So today was his turn for major surgery (as he called it). He was so worried, (Baggy thought) that he insisted that Baggy go in with him. So being a loyal wife, she did, much to the Doctor and Nurse's surprise. The Nurse asked Baggy if she was going to be okay. Of course she was, as she had no intention of looking, so she got Creative Clara to write her novel. Clara managed to write precisely one sentence before the major surgery was over! It took under five minutes to have a little skin-tag removed by laser. So ever since, he has been needing sympathy and complaining that, unlike Baggy who was allowed to rest in bed after her Lawrence-the-durmoid-cyst surgery, he had been "made to get straight up". Hahaha! Baggy loves him lots. What he was actually worried about was leaving Baggy alone in the reception area. Bless him. Clever Bird thinks it's because he was worried that Hormonal Hannah would have a meltdown being back in the surgery again.

Hormonal Hannah did however take the opportunity to make an appointment for Baggy to discuss the menopause. She is seeing the Doctor who found Lawrence, as she will have a lot less explaining to do to her. Well assuming that the Doctor remembers Baggy that is, but as it was all such a drama Clever Bird expects that she will. The appointment isn't for another few weeks and it will be interesting to see if she can help, as Baggy has zero intention of taking HRT. But although Baggy can cope with the night sweats and hot flushes (awful as they are), there are much worse symptoms, that she is not coping with so well. Her mood swings are getting beyond amusing; she has never been a particularly angry person, but now, well, her temper and irritability are ridiculous. But worse still are the regular feelings of worthlessness and a total lack of confidence, to the point that some days Baggy does not want to even leave the house! She bursts into tears for no apparent reason, can't sleep, so is permanently tired and as for her libido, well that seems to have disappeared on a round the world trip to Antarctica never to be seen again. Frankly, Calum is a Saint to put up with Hormonal Hannah, because Baggy is getting seriously fed up with her! But at least some form of action is now being taken to try to control the old bag!!!! Clever Bird knows that things have got to a desperate state, when Calum says to Baggy, "Why don't you have a glass of wine?" as he just did. Ah well, Baggy will just have to class it as her day's "syns" on her diet........

How to lose weight without trying much.

Stress. Furry Mama has had a pretty rollercoaster week one way and another, so Baggy almost didn't go to Fat Club because she was dreading what the scales would say. Well, they said that Baggy did okay - she lost a pound. Phew! This week Baggy is going to be "on it". Creative Clara really wants her to win another "shiny" (as she calls the award stickers)! Amazing what motivation a shiny sticker can be to Baggy. But Clever Bird assumes that the stress of worrying about and looking after Hinge made her lose the pound. But to be fair, Slimming World's way of eating is so simple and so ingrained in Baggy's psyche now, that even when Freda Fretter knows that Baggy is being bad, she's not being that bad. Baggy likes eating more healthily, because she feels so much better for it, so this week she is going to stick to the plan totally!

So Baggy started by getting Furry Mama to take Minty Mutt on a long bluebell walk. The smell is amazing. Calum was left at home to look after the Hinge cat.

The Hinge is doing well. Freda Fretter is pretty sure that she isn't licking her tail, but without the cone on to stop her, it's not easy to be certain without watching her 24/7. Baggy is disappointed though, because Calum, Mint and she were meant to be going to see friends in Lincoln this weekend, but they can't leave the Hinge for that long. So instead Baggy is hopeful of getting a bit of a day out on Sunday or Monday - it is mainly for Creative Clara to do some research for her novel. Watch this space!

Grotty Groom is really missing the horses. But to be fair they are probably not missing her that much - not with so much spring grass to eat. She is hopeful that they will be swapped onto night time turnout this week, then she can go back and start looking after them herself. Believe it or not, she can't wait! That will burn a few pounds off.........

The day just got better!

Calum got home early so Furry Mama took Minty Mutt out for his first walk since last Sunday, while Cal looked after the Hinge cat. Both Minty and Baggy were going a little stir-crazy, so it was lovely to be out smelling the bluebells. But four days of not walking and both Minty Mutt and Baggy struggled to get up the steep steps! Minty couldn't wait to hurl himself into the muddy stream, he was so delighted to be out and about. Bless him, he's been such a good boy - not licked the Hinge once, even when she was throwing herself at him, so he deserved a good muddy dunking.

 
He deserved it even more for putting up with Hormonal Hannah's short fuse! Hinge wasn't too keen to be put in the travel basket once more and moaned all the way to the vets', but it was good news. Her little tail is healing really well apparently, so well in fact that she no longer needs to be given the antibiotics - she wasn't eating them anyway! Clever bird reckons that they must have tasted disgusting as usually the Hinge eats anything (as you can probably tell bloggees), but she has pretty much not eaten since Monday now, and Furry Mama was getting worried. Rightfully so apparently, as losing weight too fast for fat cats, can cause liver damage. So the first thing Baggy did when she got home was throw away the penicillin laden food. The Domestic Goddess washed up the bowl, having totally forgotten to put Baggy's gloves on (drrrrrrrrrr!) and filled it with lovely dried food. Furry Mama took off the cone and plopped Hinge on the windowsill with the food. Hinge gobbled it. Phew! So far so good with not licking her tail either, so the cone can stay off. She is now fast asleep under Creative Clara's feet as she types this. And take in big happy breaths........

It's all getting a bit much now.

Hormonal Hannah is at the end of her not so little tether! She has sent Baggy's brain to mush too. Last night she got Baggy to try and call Calum to say goodnight, on the remote control! She then couldn't work out why the channel changed on the telly. Seriously, it's a worry. Furry Mama then shut the Hinge cat in the spare bedroom as she has each night; she is safe from being "licked" in there and it's her favourite room to sleep in normally. Baggy and Bracket kat were just nodding off, when there was a loud noise of plastic on wood. The Hinge was trying to get through the shut door. Freda Fretter couldn't leave her there so Baggy went and tried to open the door - easier said than done, when there is a very fat cat with her "cone" pressed on it from the other side. Baggy managed it eventually, then Freda waited to see what Hinge would do. Furry Mama couldn't let her go downstairs because Minty Mutt might start trying to lick her tail. Baggy went back to bed and listened.

The creaking floorboards in the bedroom were the clue that she was heading to Furry Mama. Suddenly a plastic-headed fur ball leapt over the end of the bed and landed on Baggy, scaring the living daylights out of Bracket kat, who leapt about two feet in the air and shot out of the bedroom hissing like a snake. The Hinge is clearly going through the same night-fears that Baggy went through after her operation and wanted some company. She slept with Furry Mama all night, as Bracket sulked on the landing.

This morning the Hinge was determined to get outside. Mint and Bracket went out, so why couldn't she? Meow, meow, meow! Furry Mama tried to explain. She decided to feed the Hinge while the other two were out. Clever Bird took Hinge's collar off. Baggy put her gloves on and crushed up the antibiotic tablet in cling film before putting it on her food. (As Baggy is allergic to the penicillin in it, she must not touch it). Hinge had one mouthful, then meowed to go out again. And breathe Baggy. Clever Bird kept an eye on things. Hinge jumped down from her food and looked pitifully at Furry Mama and meowed more to go out. Furry Mama put her back by her food. And repeat! Clever Bird took Baggy's gloves off. Hinge decided to scratch the door as Minty does when he wants to go out. Furry Mama plopped the Hinge on the cat litter, she hopped off. And repeat.

Baggy gave up. And picked up the penicillin covered cling film and put it in the bin - arrrrggggghhh! Quick hand wash. And breathe. Minty Mutt was by now scratching the paint off the back door trying to get in. Baggy opened the door. Bracket shot through his legs and hissed at the cone-thing. Minty Mutt went to protect the Hinge and trod on Baggy's bare foot. Hormonal Hannah yelled at him; he spun round and trod on the Hinge. And breathe. Clever Bird decided that she had better give in on the Hinge eating and put the cone back on her - yeah right! Eventually she succeeded. Cue massive hot flush for Baggy to go with the frayed nerves. Well at least Calum will be home in time to come to the vets with Furry Mama............

It's been a long old Wednesday for Furry Mama.

Furry Mama is trying soooooooooo hard, but Hormonal Hannah just feels so sorry for the Hinge. She's a cute cat, but possibly not the brightest! She accidentally got the cone off her head. Freda Fretter was panicking that she wouldn't be able to get it on her again. But Furry Mama felt she needed a bit of "off" time, so she left it off for a while, so she could scratch her head and groom herself a bit. But inevitably she eventually started to lick her poorly tail, so Clever Bird realised that she would have to put it on again. Much pushing and squashing ensued - poor little cat, but Baggy managed to get it back on her.

Then Furry Mama fed everyone. Except that Hinge wouldn't touch hers. It must hurt having the plastic bit stuck in her neck, but she needs to eat, especially as her antibiotics and painkiller are in the food. So Clever Bird took the cone back off. Good plan - Hinge ate most of her food. Getting it back on her a second time was a bit more difficult; not surprisingly she didn't want it back on, but Baggy managed, eventually. Thanks goodness the Hinge isn't bright enough to remember how she got it off last time. Baggy is very glad that Hinge goes for her check up tomorrow. She is praying that the cone can come off permanently!

Furry Mama also spent a lot of time playing ball with the very patient Minty Mutt, in between showers today. He is so fed up not to have had a walk Bless him, but as soon as Furry Mama gets the all clear for Hinge, they'll go on an extra long one. Baggy needs to burn off the calories too, frankly. Gloria Gardener planted the sweet peas in between ball throwing. But best of all, t'internet is back!!!!!! Yay! So Baggy managed to put a few more things onto her etsy shop Realuv. She has a long way to go to make it look like a fully stocked "proper" shop, but Clever Bird has started raiding her collections, so.............

What a blooming drama!

Fact: Baggy would never make a nurse, veterinary or otherwise! How Calum and Baggy's sister Debby coped looking after Baggy, is completely beyond Clever Bird. Furry Mama is struggling looking after the Hinge cat and it has only been two days so far. But at least Baggy could speak and let people know how she was feeling and what she needed, poor little Hinge cat does speak, but Furry Mama keeps having to say "no". Because Hinge is so over weight, "big-boned", she gets constipated. So for a long time now, she has preferred to go outside to poo - probably because the cat litter hurts her little paws. (Clever Bird did try the soft paper cat litter, but neither cat would use it.)  If she can't go out, she tends to use a bath mat!!!! At least they wash. But of course she is not allowed out at the moment, so Clever Bird keeps plopping her on the litter; she hops off again. Furry Mama has even told her she can use the bath mats - she hasn't done. Furry Mama is a bit concerned that she doesn't know when Hinge last did any of her ablutions. Freda Fretter is stressing over it! Hinge has always been a large cat, even when they arrived in Baggy's life she was much larger than Bracket.

But she is a very happy cat and Furry Mama is struggling seeing her "wounded". Poor Minty Mutt is struggling too! He wants to lick her better and keeps getting shouted at for trying. The last thing Hinge needs is the wound getting infected, especially as she is struggling to eat much, so Freda is not sure if she is getting all her antibiotics. As Baggy is allergic to penicillin, it is all proving a bit of a drama. So hats off to Calum and Debby and all nurses everywhere for your patience and understanding of your patients' needs - you all deserve massive thanks and appreciation. Baggy is just rubbish at it.........

Hinge is getting used to her cone.

Sorry if Baggy vanishes on you for a while bloggees, she has had no internet connection for the last thirty-six hours. Clever Bird phoned to complain and was told that it might be off until the 30th, but a storm has just hit the village and the signal came on, so Creative Clara is doing a rapid blog. Whether it will post remains to be seen, but Furry Mama wanted to update you all on how Hinge cat is. Furry Mama is happy to say that she seems to be doing well. She is really struggling coping with her cone, she keeps getting stuck on things, including the carpet, but she is being so brave. Her tail looks as though it is healing well from what Clever Bird can see, but she keeps curling it round as though she is trying to create a new hinge. It's taken a bit of doing to work out how to help her eat and drink, but Clever Bird got there in the end.

Poor Minty Mutt is going stir crazy as Furry Mama doesn't want to leave Hinge on her own, so he hasn't had a walk for two days. Bracket kat is terrified of her sister and spends most of her time avoiding her. Baggy is going nuts trying to control everyone with no internet to distract her, so the fact that it has just come on is a major relief. At least Clara has got a lot of novel writing done. Baggy is really not looking forward to Fat Club though; comfort eating at the weekend has been followed up by rubbish eating ever since as The Domestic Goddess hasn't been food shopping. It's going to be a trying week, but at least the Hinge is purring her little head off...........

One of Furry Mama's children has had an amputation!

Yesterday went a little pear-shaped to say the least. First thing yesterday, while The Domestic Goddess was making her morning cup of tea, Clever Bird noticed spots and smears of blood all over the kitchen floor. Furry Mama checked everybody's paws: Calum was okay, Minty Mutt was okay, Hinge was okay, Bracket was okay, Baggy was okay! So she checked mouths - nothing. So she checked bottoms (not Calum's!), they too were okay. It was a mystery. As you know from yesterday's blog, Calum, Baggy and Minty Mutt then went out for the day. As normal when they got home and the four-legged furries were all fed, Hinge and Bracket wanted cuddles. Bracket hopped onto Furry Mama, Hinge hopped onto Calum. Calum stroked Hinge and thought that she had wee'd on him because his hand got so wet, only to realise that it was blood - lots of it! All over his hands and trousers. Amazingly, thankfully, not all over the new chair. Eventually Furry Mama realised that it was Hinge's tail that was pouring blood.

Hinge and Bracket were Baggy's wedding present from Calum nearly six years ago. They are rescue cats and named after a comedy act from many years ago - two old women, who were actually two men in drag - hilarious. They got called Hinge and Bracket because Hinge had a "hinge" at the end of her tail. It was probably broken and left when she was a tiny kitten. It has never hurt her, but frequently gets things stuck in it. Furry Mama has pulled out stinging nettles, brambles and branches in the past. But yesterday morning she must have caught it on something really sharp.

Probably the wire squares of stock fencing that the neighbours' fences are all made from, if she has hopped through a square. So Furry Mama called the emergency vet and she and Calum drove the Hinge to Bury St Edmunds which is a forty-five minute drive. Poor Hinge hates travelling. Only ever does it to go to the local vets (twenty minutes away) and then always with her sister, so being on her own was awful. She meowed all the way there, had an accident half way there and the smell was unbearable - how can anything that awful come out of something so cute?

They took her straight in to bandage her tail and stop the bleeding. Apparently the cut was right through into the bone and had therefore effectively re-broken it, so it would need to be stitched under general anaesthetic. But then the vet suggested that it might be best to amputate the whole "hinged" bit off, as the chances are that she would do it again and she is only five years old. Hormonal Hannah had Furry Mama in floods of tears, so the vet back-tracked, but Clever Bird realised that it was the best thing for Hinge long term. As Furry Mama was pretty sure that Hinge had eaten at about four (although actually Clever Bird couldn't remember for sure what time it had been), they couldn't operate until gone nine. So Calum and Furry Mama were to go home and return for her at midnight. Baggy was starving, so Calum and she went for a meal. Diet blown again. Especially when Furry Mama needed a large Pinot Grigio to settle her unravelling nerves, seriously, Baggy blubbing in a restaurant - just embarrassing!

Once home again they had a phone call at about ten-thirty to say that the operation had gone well, but Hinge (being so fat) was not waking up properly, so by the time she did it would be so late the nurses would be going home, so they wanted to keep her in. Baggy had a bad night, but the vet phoned at eight this morning to say Furry Mama could collect Hinge after nine.

She was so happy to be home but Furry Mama is in for a really long week. The cone to stop her licking (and infecting) her tail is driving her nuts. She constantly walks in to things. Minty Mutt keeps trying to lick her better. She can't reach her food or water. She keeps falling off the sofa. Minty is guarding her with full on barks which scares her - she tries to run off, the cone catches on the carpet, and on and on. But Baggy is so so pleased that she is home, so she will just stay with her until she knows that she is safe. Minty Mutt is going to have to get used to staying in for a while; Furry Mama will play ball with him in the garden when Hinge is asleep. Furry Mama has set her up in the spare bedroom - trouble is she just won't stay there. Getting her antibiotics (penicillin that Baggy is highly allergic to) and painkiller in her tonight is going to be fun!

Meanwhile it has taken nearly ninety minutes for Creative Clara to write this blog as t'internet is not working properly. Yep, Hormonal Hannah is taking full advantage of Baggy's stress. Clever Bird just needs to try to stop Baggy from comfort eating for the rest of the week and Clever Bird supposes that the Hinge will now need to be renamed Hingeless......

The pot garden may have gone a little OTT!

As promised bloggees, here is the photo of some of yesterday's efforts - the nutty bits that Gloria Gardener decided needed adding to her pot garden. Now in some ways Clever Bird realises that locating the pot garden where Gloria has is a little nuts in itself, as the bit in the neighbour's garden is their compost and poles and things bit, so it's a bit of an eyesore, but the idea is to try to hide it! This is the view from Baggy's summerhouse after all, so it does make sense really.

There are four different climbers in the pots, so hopefully they will crawl up and over the trellis and along the fence and make a lovely sight and smell for both Baggy and the neighbours. Gloria just needs to keep them alive. Baggy realises that this pot garden might be a bit of an acquired taste, but Calum and Baggy love it. Baggy had to get the dragon as he reminds her of someone very close to her - a.k.a. her husband.

As for the lizards - well Baggy loved them and was just going to get one, but two of them were stuck to each other (as it were) so it seemed rude to separate them. That left just one in the shop. Well of course Hormonal Hannah couldn't leave it on its own as it would have been lonely, so it came too.

Then Creative Clara decided water was required, so she persuaded Calum to donate his tub for cooling off his metalwork.

 

Tomorrow Gloria needs to plant her sweetpeas in the little coloured pots and we have lift off. Once the solar lanterns are charged up Baggy will get Creative Clara to attempt to take a night-time photo of it all, but Baggy is quite chuffed with their efforts.

 



Today Calum wanted to go and look at water features at a garden centre in Coggeshall in Essex. Baggy agreed to go, as long as a) Furry Mama could bring Minty Mutt and b) they didn't buy anything, as frankly neither of them should be allowed out of the house with a credit card. (No not Mint bloggees, Calum - funnily enough Mint is not very good at remembering the pin number). Amazingly, both of these conditions were met, albeit Baggy now has her eyes on a pond and a summer house (that will double as a motorbike shed for the winter). Hopeless! But at least she didn't order them. Furry Mama and Calum then took Minty Mutt for a bit of a walk around the little town of Coggeshall, before heading home........

It's good to have dreams.

Well sorry bloggees that this is rather late, but Baggy and Calum have been rather busy and have totally run out of day. They started off with Furry Mama and Cal taking Minty Mutt to the yard, not to see the horses, as they were out, but to take Minty for a walk to sneak a look at a house. It is a house that Grotty Groom and Calum have been riding past for about six years. It has been empty all that time (and probably a lot longer) and they have wondered about it and day-dreamed of owning it. Yesterday they spotted it in an estate agent's window. It is a gorgeous detached thatched house in a perfect very rural location. It has a small garden and is just two bedrooms, but obviously it's very neglected. So neglected in fact that despite its prime location they thought it might be on the market for around £150 - £200K. Urmmmmm, nope! £375K!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So Calum was intrigued to get a closer look from foot, rather than peering through the thick hedge from horseback. The estate agent said that they were welcome to have a nose, soooooooo! Having walked up to it they realised the one next door was also for sale and that is gorgeous. So noses pressed on windows and it is lovely. Very sadly it's fully furnished and in a bit of a time warp, but it is literally falling apart. Total new thatch needed, probably £50K. The garden is a wild wood - thousands of pounds. The plaster is falling off the walls, revealing the wattle and daub. More thousands. The trees are growing into the base sill. Lots of thousands. Heaven knows what needs doing inside. So Clever Bird was intrigued to see what the immaculate, much bigger house next door is on for - she just checked - £475K and it is immaculate! So who the heck are they kidding with their £375K? But if Calum has won the lottery (well a lot more than a tenner), we will be buying it. It is our dream house - dream being the operative word - but everyone has to have a dream. So until Calum wins a million quid we will just remain happy with our little dream house!

Grotty Groom waved to the Boys through the hail storm on the way home. Once home, Gloria Gardener dragged Calum out to sort a shed. But Clever Bird got side-tracked and instead, they further developed Gloria's pot garden. Cut down a hawthorn tree. Cut hedges. Lopped off branches and then  went to the DIY superstore where everything is still free (thanks to the gift card from Baggy's bank account), to get a bit of trellising. A second garden centre was then visited and various nutty things bought! By the time everything was erected, it was nearly 8.00pm. So they headed back out for a pizza. Yep, Baggy is supposed to be being good. Nope she wasn't! Salt and butterscotch slice with mascarpone was also consumed. So they have only just got home. The photos of the new and improved pot garden will be taken and added to Baggy's blog tomorrow - hail storms permitting..............

Clever Bird really does need a stern talking to.

Well there were no surprises at Fat Club, as anticipated Baggy had put a pound on. Pancakes, pancakes, pancakes and more pancakes would do that. In fact Clever Bird thinks that she got off very lightly ('scuse the pun). But Baggy is fine with it, she can get rid of a pound, she just needs to focus this week. Onwards and skinny-wards. On the way home, Clever Bird persuaded Calum to go and have a look at the local auction again, except this one was billed as a Fine Arts Auction. For Fine Arts, read posh expensive stuff and that would be about right! Creative Clara had her eye on quite a few things, but they were all things that she collects, not things to sell. The estimates on them were low - had they just been for sale, she would have been sorely tempted, but an auction is an auction! And the woman is supposed to be de-cluttering, not buying more for the house. Clever Bird was very good though she made Baggy step away from the commission bidding forms. She will behave and wait for the next General Auction where bargains are much more likely to be bought for Baggy's little etsy shop. She is loving her little shop and very grateful for the support for it from friends and bloggees.

When they got home it was to discover that Clever Bird had struck again. She had decided to book the cess pit cleaning man (even though she "didn't need him"), but he was visiting a neighbour yesterday, so she asked. He offered to come today. Lovely. He was in the back garden when Calum and Baggy got home. Apparently the solids were, well, solid! They would not suck up his pipe. He asked when it had last been done. Baggy said, "ages ago, as it hadn't needed doing because it wasn't full". Apparently that is not relevant. It should be emptied at least once a year. Who knew? Not Clever Bird clearly, as although she didn't admit it, it was last emptied six years ago. Much hosing of water ensued, while Baggy retired to a safe distance (locked inside the house) out of the way. The job probably took twice as long as it should have, but Baggy did get The Domestic Goddess to rustle him up a cup of strong tea. The joys of living in the middle of nowhere!

Baggy is about to set Clever Bird in action if t'internet signal stays on - (praying now), because she needs to research her latest purchases for Realuv. She found a charity shop that clearly doesn't have staff who spend hours researching their stuff before then totally over-pricing them, she found some lovely things that need a new home and they were at jumble sale prices, so she is rather chuffed. The charity shop was also chuffed. Win, win. Shame it was closing or she would have bought more, but she will be back.............

Baggy is definitely not normal.

Baggy is not feeling great, so apologies in advance from the gang! None of them is doing anything particularly interesting to report on (some might say, "nothing new there then", but Clever Bird feels that might be a little harsh), so Clara's blogs might be a little less action packed for a while. Baggy always knew that she was setting herself up with a challenge once her recovery days were over! The original purpose of the blog was always to chart her recovery from her Lawrence-the-durmoid-cyst surgery and if in the process it helped someone else, that would be a bonus. Now that she is 98% recovered, her life, is just her life - and very happy she is to be alive to enjoy it - but it rarely makes for interesting blogging. She is not saving lives, or the planet, or climbing mountains, or deep sea diving, she is just getting on with life in sleepy Suffolk. So it occurs to Clever Bird that as one of the MAJOR left-overs from the surgery, is Baggy being joined by the horrible gang member, who is Hormonal Hannah, perhaps she should be a little bit more honest and open about Hannah's sometimes overwhelming influence on Baggy.

Mind you, Freda Fretter is not sure whether Baggy's current state of achy, low feelings, are Hormonal Hannah and her menopause symptoms, or something else. Certainly she is being a b-i-t-c-h at night, the sweats are verging on unbearable, especially when they start with the blood pounding so dramatically through Baggy's veins that her stomach and arm scar feel so painful. Just as well she has a double bed to herself all week because you could wring the sheets out where she lays, so she has to unstick herself and shuffle across to the other half. It probably explains why she wakes up with a headache most mornings - dehydrated. But this week Lawrence has been hurting like heck too; well obviously he hasn't, because he's not there anymore, so either phantom-Lawrence is hurting, or "hole-of Lawrence" is hurting! Either way, Baggy is looking forward to her session with Wesley's physiotherapist and finding out a bit more about what is going on. The physio told Baggy years ago that Baggy had absolutely no core strength! Her stomach muscles were so strong that she used them instead of her core - well that makes sense really, as Clever Bird now realises - it's difficult to build a core strength when you have a 15cm Lawrence in the way! Now Baggy's massively strong muscles have been severed and her insides are trying to work out how to cope with a new hole. It hurts. So it's hardly surprising that although Baggy keeps thinking that she is okay, whenever one of the gang over do it, she is in a considerable amount of pain.

But at least Creative Clara is on a roll at the moment; her novel is coming along nicely. One day in the dim and distant future it might even get finished..........

Spring in Suffolk - but not as you know it.

Creative Clara has got into a "thing", it's probably not a great thing either as it plays to Hormonal Hannah's tendencies; but anyway, her "thing" is to start writing her novel, when Baggy should be going to bed! She'll start at about 10.00pm, then still be up writing (or just thinking about writing) at gone midnight. Hannah has got a bit better with the whole "going to bed" thing - she is no longer scared and freaking out about it, but still, Clever Bird can't help but wonder if this is a diversionary tactic on her part. She did however read though, that some author's best ideas come to them when they are in that dream-world between wake and sleep, so let's hope that that is the case. Baggy is beginning to understand why it can take years to write a novel! It's really not that easy - says she like that is some kind of revelation. But she is enjoying the process and will persevere - there is only one way to find out if Creative Clara is capable of writing a novel after all and that is for her to do it.

Baggy did at least manage to wake up this morning, even after Clara burning the midnight oil. Furry Mama took the ever more keen Minty Mutt out for his walk. It didn't start well. She was horrified to spot an injured or possibly dead black cat by the side of the road. She walked over to check on it with some trepidation, only for Grotty Groom to point out that it was a pile of horse poo. Time for Baggy to get her eyes checked again perhaps?

As they walked around a massive field Baggy heard police sirens going, she thought the wind must be carrying the noise across from the nearby A-road, only for the sound to change into a very pretty song and then back to sirens again! Clearly the Sky Lark is living too close to the road and thinks that that will be a good tune for him to get his wife-bird. Spring has sprung in mysterious ways in Suffolk!

Home for The Domestic Goddess to fight the house. Unfortunately she lost the fight with the pesky vacuum cleaner whose hose refused to disconnect so that she could change it into an "upright" one and get round all the edges and bits, but at least she tried. She blames Baggy's arm which is unfair as Baggy tried hard.

Now Creative Clara is having her time, because it's too nice to be indoors, so she dragged Baggy to the summer house to write her blog and check the world that is Twitterverse. She was rather taken aback to realise that Baggy now has 204 followers on Twitter!!!!!!!!! Nearly all authors, publishers and the like, so she is rather flattered as well as surprised. Clara had also written a new journal entry for her www.channillo.com journal series yesterday which she tweeted about. Not only has a published author retweeted it (or tweet-tweeted it) as Clara prefers to say, but it must have been read because it is all about Psychic Ploppo and one of Baggy's new followers today is a psychic site..........

Busy, busy, busy.

Busy day again. Minty Mutt is definitely feeling very puppy-like; walks are getting longer and longer. But with weather this glorious Clever Bird can't fault him for that.

The Domestic Goddess is getting a little cheesed off with Furry Mama letting Minty Mutt lie down in the muddiest puddles that he can find though. How she is supposed to keep anything clean in the house when the Mutt comes home like that is beyond her.

But it's Gloria Gardener who is excelling her little self at the moment. Clever Bird decided that it was much too nice for Baggy to stay indoors, so she chivvied Gloria into action. The grass has shot up. Strimming is hard work! But she is actually beginning to vaguely enjoy gardening! It's a bit of a miracle.

Clever Bird is just hoping that between the two of them they have burnt enough calories off Baggy to get rid of the pancakes that she indulged in for the second night in a row. Hopeless woman. Trouble is between Creative Clara's blog, her www.channillo.com series, her novel writing and adding products to Realuv, Baggy now does not have anywhere near enough hours in the day. Freda Fretter is wondering how the heck Baggy is going to manage when Grotty Groom actually starts to look after the horses again. Grotty has once more not been over to see them today - can't face the atmosphere. Yeah bloggees, she did say that she was going to toughen up, but Hormonal Hannah is preventing that, pesky woman. Mind you she has one thing in her favour, she is giving Baggy so many hot flushes at the moment, that Baggy must have lost a pound in weight in liquid.........

Baggy might have over done it - again.

Grotty so enjoyed riding Wesley yesterday that apparently she lost track of time. Clever Bird thought that Grotty was riding for about twenty minutes. Apparently not! Calum told Baggy when she complained to him on the phone this morning, that she ached rather a lot, that Grotty was riding for well over an hour. Time certainly does fly when you're having fun!

Unfortunately today, she knows about it - both operation spots are rather tender. So although the Boys were once again kept in for the day and Grotty had every intention of riding, it seemed like a bad idea. So instead, Clever Bird persuaded Furry Mama to let Minty Mutt choose the walk. Uh huh! One hour and forty-five minutes later they got home. Minty decided to combine two walks, but as the weather was cold but sunny, Baggy coped.

When they got home Gloria Gardener decided that she needed to plant the two plants that Calum bought at the weekend. And weed the terrace around the summer house. And poison a few nettles. And weed a flower bed. And sprinkle stuff to keep the cats off. And put the herbs into tin cans. And water it all - in between making time for Furry Mama to constantly throw the ball for Minty Mutt. Two hours later she realised that The Domestic Goddess needed to rustle up some lunch.

Then Baggy wanted to add a few more products to her Etsy shop. It took rather a while, especially when Creative Clara decided to make up a little logo for it.

So another three hours of day had gone and Grotty didn't even go and see the horses, but it's so, so cold, that maybe that was for the best as far as Baggy is concerned. Now the fire is blazing, Furry Mama has just persuaded the cats to come in so Creative Clara can blog without worrying about them being out in the dark. Now The Goddess is going to polish cutlery, ready for photography to go in her Realuv shop..........
 

Grotty Groom schooled the Boy Wessles and Baggy coped - just!

 

Grotty Groom on The Boy Wessles and loving every second of it!

 

Grotty Groom was absolutely determined to see and ride her Boy today. When Calum and Baggy got to the yard, it was to discover that they have not been turned out for three days, as unfortunately their paddocks are more of a pond than anything else at the moment, due to the various torrential downpours. Both horses were very chilled though and happily munching their hay. They had had a good work out on the horse-walker this morning. Calum and Grotty groomed enough hair out of them to stuff a duvet, at which point Calum decided that he didn't want to ride after all. Baggy, who is in pain, was tempted to duck out too, but Grotty was determined to do something with Wesley, so she decided to kick Hormonal Hannah, (who was insisting that Grotty was asking for trouble), into touch and ride him in the school. Now bear in mind bloggees that Clever Bird cannot remember the last time that Grotty schooled Wesley, but it must be well over nine months ago, and was certainly a considerable time before Baggy's Lawrence-the-durmoid cyst and arm surgery, so this was a big deal to Baggy!

It was with a certain amount of trepidation that she took Wesley into the school, especially as there was a clinic going on in the other arena. The Boy was a gem. Baggy caused Grotty to ride like a sack of potatoes - even though Clever Bird thought that she was glued to the saddle! Urmmm, nope! As you can see she was actually bouncing about on poor Wesley's bad back, hence Wesley's bent and arched back to get away from Grotty's bounce, but he got on with it anyway, Bless him. Now Clever Bird knows that Grotty looks a total mess, clearly Baggy's stomach muscles are shot, but Baggy is just so delighted to be back on her horse and Wesley is being so patient with her, that she doesn't care. Grotty adores that horse! He can be a major handful and very difficult to ride, especially at this time of year, but he knows that his Mum is not quite right, so he is looking after her and that is the strength of his connection with Baggy. Yep, she adores the Boy.

Of course now she is home, Baggy is in a considerable amount of pain, but it was sooooooooo worth it.........................

Where did spring go to?

Clever Bird is not sure where today went! Okay admittedly Baggy had a bit of a lie in, she needed it for some reason. Although she has declared herself recovered from her two operations, she actually isn't. Clever Bird is unsure if it's because it has got so cold, but Baggy's arm is rather tender, but that's kind of expected as it is still healing. It takes months for the nerve to recover. But it's Baggy's stomach that is freaking out Freda Fretter slightly. Where her dippy-in bit was on her scar, it has gone very peculiar. There still is a dippy-in bit. When Baggy touches the scar area, she can feel nothing which is very unnerving ('scuse the pun)! So she hasn't been touching it. But her stomach has been hurting a bit inside, so she decided to feel it. Yuck! It feels as though there is a nest of hard-boiled pigeon eggs in there. Clever Bird presumes that it is the scar tissue, but she wasn't expecting it to feel like that. Horrible. She thought it would perhaps feel "solid", but not with great lumps! She has the physiotherapist who treats Wesley coming to treat Baggy in a couple of weeks though, so if she can stop Freda from having a meltdown over it in the meantime, she'll be able to find out if it's normal. Although if it's not, Heaven only knows what can be done about it. But the fact is that Baggy struggles still to lift anything heavy. Even getting the shopping into the supermarket trolley - ouch.

Grotty Groom spent a tiny amount of time with her boys this afternoon. They haven't been out sadly as it's been so wet. Grotty had wanted to ride, but it is way too cold. It was literally freezing at the yard and getting on the Boy Wessles when he is cold and has not had any time out in his paddock, is rather asking for trouble, so she didn't risk it. Truthfully Baggy doesn't feel strong enough anyway. Bit sad really. Warm weather required. Instead Calum has lit the fire and everyone is currently fighting for a spot in front of it. Where did spring go?

So because she is feeling a bit down Hormonal Hannah persuaded Baggy to break her diet and eat comfort food for tea, so she's just had a mahoosive pizza followed by apple pie and custard. Well it's just too cold for salad..........

Clever Bird is a total dipstick - FACT!

There is nothing like launching a little shop on Etsy and mentioning it on your blog and spelling the name wrong is there Clever Bird? Then doing the same thing on Facebook and probably Twitter! Clever Bird is a large dipstick bloggees, but then you all know that already! Thank you to Baggy's friend, Clare, who pointed out that she is a dipstick, or a "prune" was what she actually called Baggy, Clever Bird has now corrected the error. You would never guess that Baggy was a Senior Executive in marketing for over twenty years would you? Ah well, it's why people luv her!!!!! So the name of Baggy's shop is Realuv. Right, now that's done, I'm delighted to say that thanks to another friend, Lettra, Baggy has despatched her first order off this afternoon. Now Freda Fretter is going to worry until it (hopefully) arrives safely, but to say that Baggy was excited is an understatement, she can't wait to build her stock up and hopefully get selling.

Other news: Fat Club - Baggy was expecting a weight loss of at least 4lbs as Clever Bird had her on the scales this week as discussed in a previous blog. No logic to this as frankly, Baggy is far from 100% on her healthy eating plan. The good news is that she had lost weight. Just 1/2lb, but a loss is good so that's fine. So Clever Bird made Baggy get back on the scales when she got home. They still insisted that she had lost 4lbs! Clever Bird then moved the scales onto a different tile. And put 5lbs ON!!!!!! Hmmmmmm! The scales are the ones Baggy bought as a student, so that might have something to do with it, as that makes them thirty-eight years old! Good old Clever Bird.

For her final trick of the day, Clever Bird decided to visit all the charity shops in town when she posted off her first order. She thought she might find a bargain for her Etsy shop. No chance! Charity shops clearly now employ their own clever birds, as if anything the pieces that could have been potential bargains were actually over-priced! Perhaps it's time for Baggy to take Clever Bird to her first ever car boot sale.........

Baggy has taken the first little step in creating her new business.

Baggy has spent ALL day setting up an Etsy shop on t'internet. Bearing in mind that she has put only eleven items in her shop, it was rather an effort! Not helped by the rubbish internet connection at Baggy's, especially when a full thunderstorm occurred half way through her efforts. Clever Bird also got pretty confused about what she was supposed to be doing, although the site makes it very easy really. She has obviously been on there for too long though as Baggy's elbow is burning with nerve pain. Not good. But if any of you bloggees would like a little look and wish to give Clever Bird some constructive criticism she would be grateful.

The "shop" is called Realuv and Baggy is going to try very hard to make it work. If you would like to follow her shop or add it to your Etsy favourites, she would be deliriously happy, as it might just get her on the map of zillions of shops! Next stop, a table at an antiques and collectibles fair where Baggy can meet her customers and figure out what she needs to do to make this work. It's all very exciting though and regardless, it has kept Hormonal Hannah occupied and distracted.

Furry Mama has made time for Minty Mutt too though. She took him on a very long walk before the storms hit - not that they did hit Baggyland thankfully, they passed by making a lot of noise. In fact it has been gorgeous. Calum on the other hand got caught in hailstones the size of golf balls so perhaps they will get here later..........

Baggy is vanishing.

Baggy's diet has once more gone to pot, she tries, then she fails. For instance, last night she had delicious trout fillets with new potatoes and a mahoosive salad, rustled up by The Domestic Goddess. Delicious. An hour later Baggy got the munchies and got Hormonal Hannah involved - really bad idea -  pancakes were made. But it got worse, they were horrible with sweetener so Baggy had sugar. She hopped gingerly onto the scales this morning then hopped rapidly off. When she spoke to Calum on the phone she explained that she had put four pounds on. Calum said, "You can't have", but Clever Bird insisted that she had because she had gone back to an even "stone" marker and was fed up about it. As Furry Mama was playing ball with Minty Mutt, Clever Bird couldn't work out why Baggy's jeans were falling off if she had put quarter-of-a-stone on. So she took Baggy back inside to re-weigh and yes she was on an even "stone" marker, but it was a stone less than she was thinking. Baggy's scales are so old and inaccurate that they indicate that she weighs less than the Slimming World ones, so she was totally confused about her weight, but far from putting four pounds on, she appears to have lost four. Unlikely, but Baggy can but hope, she'll find out on Friday at Fat Club.

Grotty decided to spend some time with her Boys this afternoon. She has two sets of physiotherapy exercises that she is supposed to do on Wesley. She has however realised that Baggy is not physically strong enough herself to do them! Grotty is supposed to pull Wesley's tail - she can do that. Then she is supposed to use a squeezing technique with her fingers under his ribcage to get him to lift his abdominal muscles - no chance. Baggy's abdominals are not strong enough to hold her in place to do the lift in the first place and her arm is too painful to do the lifting. But she'll keep trying.

She decided to lunge the Boy. He didn't put a hoof wrong and was walking, trotting and cantering around her like a hero, looking completely magnificent until she tried to video it, then he just wanted to be with her! Bless him...........

The "Bags for Life" count is escalating.

As friends, family and regular bloggees will know by now Clever Bird is regularly a little bit of a numpty! Yesterday was no exception, she really should have prevented Gloria Gardener from getting Baggy to lift huge, full, incredibly heavy pots through the house and to the back garden; instead she positively encouraged her. Unsurprisingly this morning Baggy woke up with a humdinger of a headache from her stiff neck. It was threatening to become a migraine, so Furry Mama delayed Minty Mutt's walk.

Clever Bird knows what moths flying out of a wallet is meant to mean, but what about a moth flying out of Baggy's knickers as happened this morning? Actually, on second thoughts, don't answer that bloggees, Hormonal Hannah does have an awful lot to answer for! Oh the delights of the menopause. Another of its delights had to be dealt with today too, Baggy had a visit to the beauticians booked. She wasn't too keen, as driving with her head spinning in pain wasn't too great but needs must. Hormonal Hannah has caused Hairy Biker Hen to be trying a little too hard to do a full impression of a hairy biker. Obviously she has the hair, but she doesn't necessarily literally want the beard and moustache to go with it, so thanks for nothing Hannah. The good news was that having them waxed off was so blooming painful that Baggy's headache went, (well briefly anyway). The poor beautician got sworn at though! Just as well she knows Baggy well.

The Domestic Goddess actually managed to get some food shopping done on the way home as Clever Bird remembered to take money with her. She did however forget the carrier bags, (the carrier bags that Baggy stepped over to open the front door), so the latest count of "bags for life" must currently be approaching sixty! The supermarket lights started to cause the threatened migraine though, so Furry Mama decided to take Minty Mutt out for some fresh air. The torrential rain had stopped by then and it was lovely to see the bluebells are almost fully out.

Minty Mutt was determined to get as wet as he could as usual, but he got slightly more than he bargained for when he jumped in the stream that was three times as deep as normal.

Baggy's headache subsided on the walk and they timed it to perfection, the downpour started again just as they got home. Well it saves Gloria Gardener the job of watering her pots.......

The gang are on a roll - it must be the sun!

Busy old day for Baggy, most of the gang have been doing stuff. Furry Mama took Minty Mutt on a long walk as it was such a glorious day. When they got home Gloria Gardener decided that the plants that were bought at the weekend needed planting. Only problem being that most of the pots were still in the front garden. Baggy managed to get them through the house and to the back garden. She had an audience the whole time she was working!

The furries do like to be with their Mama. At least Hinge and Bracket just wanted cuddles, Minty Mutt wanted his red ball thrown every few minutes. But despite the distractions Gloria managed to create a new "pot" garden. It doesn't look much at the moment, but there's a climbing rose, two cyclamens and honeysuckle that if Gloria hasn't mucked it up, will climb along the fence and make a nice-smelly pretty bit to look at from the summer house. There are also fuscias and geraniums in there, so fingers crossed they will all live to bloom and mask the view of next door's compost bin.

Creative Clara then went on a mission to come up with a name for Baggy's new "shop" on-line. Came up with one and created a new e-mail address for it. Then got carried away and bought a domain name. Clever Bird had no idea that actually she hadn't really bought it, just kind of rented it for a year and effectively given ownership of something she might well want forever, effectively to another company. So Freda Fretter went off on one then, that she had wasted money and once more tried to run before she could walk and given away her good idea. The stress caused Hormonal Hannah to give Baggy a series of hot flushes. Then she got over herself.

Then Baggy took Grotty Groom over to see her Boys. Baggy has decided that Grotty loves her Boys too much not to go over there because she feels uncomfortable, so she is toughening up! She spent over an hour grooming the Boy Wessles. Joey will have his turn tomorrow. Even Hormonal Hannah was totally chilled out by the time Grotty had finished. There's nothing like the soothing power of horses to ease the soul.

As no food shopping was done at the weekend, Baggy then took The Domestic Goddess on a detour to the supermarket on the way home. Something prompted Clever Bird to check that Baggy had her purse. She didn't. But Clever Bird was sure that she had put it in Baggy's handbag after wasting money on t'internet. Panic ensued. She got home and emptied her bag - no purse. Re-checked the car - no purse. Checked the sofa - no purse. Checked the kitchen - no purse. Decided she would have to cancel her cards, picked up the phone, noticed the purse on the chair. Phew. Pity she's got nothing to eat........

Clever Bird is even more clever than she realised.

Well today is Baggy's husband's birthday so last night Indian food was partaken of with friends and a very lovely evening it was. As soon as Baggy was back through the front door though she had other things on her mind! Junk! Clever Bird could not wait to have a closer look at the two boxes of junk she purchased yesterday at the auction. They pretty much were described as "junk" too: Lot 452: Two boxes of metalwares to include a silver-plated tray, together with a box of china and glass, to include a Dartington crystal commemorative goblet £40/£60. Clever Bird stuck in her £45 commission bid and as described yesterday got the lot ('scuse the pun) for £40 plus commission of £8.40. So she was the proud owner of £48.40 worth of junk.

Having just typed out the Lot description Clever Bird is wondering whether she left one box behind! As she has two boxes not three which the description appears to suggest there were, so tomorrow she will go and double-check whether there is yet more junk to be had, but regardless she is chuffed. Last night after the very nice meal, which blew Baggy's diet off the planet, she was feeling chilled as she started to research her junk! Clever Bird has a pretty good eye for antiques and collectibles, she does have lots after all and has spent many an hour in antique shops and fairs, so she was optimistic. The first thing she checked out was a white jug that she was pretty sure was old. Then the pair of dogs. Then the commemorative goblet. Finally the resin statue of The Three Graces. By then it was nearly 2.00am but Clever Bird was justified in her delight!

The white Fern jug was made in August 1859 by William Brownfield at Cobridge: value £50. The matched pair of Staffordshire dogs are made by Beswick: value £20. Dartington Limited Edition Crystal Goblet: value £15. Resin statue of The Three Graces, Made in Italy: value £20 - £50. So Clever Bird's first four bits of junk are worth at least £105! Now Baggy has to sell them rather than getting over attached and filling the house with yet more stuff. There is loads more! A Japanese "tea" service, an old hand-painted teapot, loads and loads of cutlery - some of which is solid silver, two hand-painted eggs, some repro. collectible jugs, other bits of Royal memorabilia, vases, cut-crystal pieces, bone china ornaments, pot-pourri dish, two weird copper things, some wooden bits, lots of silver-plate etc etc etc! Clever Bird is loving researching it all, it will take a while, there is so much of it. But as long as she can bring herself to sell things Baggy now has a way of earning some money while Creative Clara writes her novel. Pity there is only one auction a month. Yeah right, there must be loads..........

Clever Bird is soooooooooooooo excited!

Yesterday when Calum got home from work he dragged Baggy kicking and screaming to the auction house that is just a mile from our house. Baggy wasn't keen because if she falls for something and she can afford it, then she likes to buy it, not to risk paying way more than she intended (she does after all have the will power of a gnat), or worse still, to not be able to buy it at all. But it was viewing day and Cal wanted to view. The place was heaving and trying to see anything at all was not easy. Hormonal Hannah declared that there was a lot of junk (well truthfully there was). The things that Baggy liked were as per normal, the most expensive, plus there is no way they would have fitted in Baggy's little house anyway. There were however two very large matching rugs which were virtually the last Lot of the day. Unusually both Baggy and Calum quite liked them. Their guide price was ridiculously low, much less than one rug of a quarter the size would cost. This morning Calum said, "Right, are we going to the auction then?" "Oh. Are we?" Well as he clearly wanted to go and it's his birthday tomorrow, Baggy decided to be gracious.

It wasn't possible to re-view the rugs as they were underneath the chairs of the people bidding, so they didn't even try. Clever Bird suggested that perhaps they could put in a commission bid on them, then a) they wouldn't get carried away and b) they wouldn't have to hang around until the end of the auction. So that's what they did. Then Calum wanted a look around again. Grrrrrrrr! But it's his birthday, so......... Actually it was quite a good plan, as there were so few people looking it was actually possible to see things. Cal pointed out two little hand-painted eggs signed and dated 1979 and 1980. Someone had put a lot of love into them but they weren't really to Baggy's taste, but there were lots of other bits in the box that were quite fun. When Clever Bird checked the guide, the Lot included everything in the box and in the box next to it. Frankly most of it was junk but there was an awful lot of it. So Clever Bird decided to put a commission bid on it with a plan to start selling on-line, something she's been threatening to do for years. She hasn't so far, mainly because she doesn't want to sell any of her things and because her internet connection is frequently so dubious. But selling a bit of junk for some profit - worth a whirl.

Calum and Baggy headed off to the DIY store to look at multi-purpose, folding ladders. Gloria Gardener bought some more plants for her new pots; next week's task. Petrol bought for the car and the lawnmower. Home via the auction house to check where the bidding had got to - past Baggy's boxes of junk. Clever Bird decided to  ask whether she had got them - she had! For £5 less than she offered. So either she has chucked away £40, or she is about to start making some money as an internet trader. Either way, it was good fun and for her first ever auction it meant that she has got totally over-excited. She didn't even bother going through the boxes properly, so when they come home it will be like opening a Christmas lucky-dip parcel. Clever Bird is so excited - big kid. Now they just have to wait and see whether they have got the rugs too................

Baggy might be pushing her luck.

Hahahahahahahahaha Clever Bird is loving the ads that are appearing on Baggy Body's blog! Just a shame that some of them are retrospective. Creative Clara needs to start writing about things she needs to know about rather than stuff that's already gone. The sofa and chair are purchased, as is the mattress; therefore Big Brother software, she no longer needs to buy them. No she doesn't need software either!!! The Domestic Goddess is however loving today's advert for Domestic Cleaning Services. Plus Baggy got very excited when the brochures that she had ordered from Silversea Cruises arrived in the post today. They look absolutely incredible. There is a minor detail that Clever Bird has spotted - there are no prices in the brochures! It has occurred to her that this is because it's a case of "If you have to ask how much it is, you can't afford it". Cruises are always expensive, but she suspects she has requested the brochures for the crème-de-la-crème of cruising! Well Clara can dream can't she? Or perhaps dribble might be a better description of what she's doing as she looks at the (very expensive) brochures!

As Creative Clara types this, Baggy is sitting on the new chair! It finally had its leg sorted out this morning. It took all of ten minutes, a chunk of which time was taking photos of the before (no legs) and after (legs). Hormonal Hannah has only been waiting for over three flipping weeks for it to be sorted. As the chap said, "It would help if they trained the delivery men in how to put the furniture together". Uh huh! But at least it's done and he was early enough for Baggy to get to Fat Club. (By the way Big Brother software, Baggy is now a fairly slim Body and does not need adverts for Plus-size clothing. Lots of ones for hippy and bohemian clothes would be welcome though). Much to Freda Fretters surprise and delight Baggy had actually lost half-a-pound. Bearing in mind the excesses of the weekend with Baggy's sister, cake, Paninis, cappuccinos, more cake, wine, crisps, more wine, wine, cake, more crisps, wine etc., it was nothing short of a miracle. Clearly climbing vertical hills is the way forward. Well it might be if there were any in Suffolk.

Clever Bird is however extremely happy to realise that Baggy can have weekends off her diet and not pile a ton of weight back on. She just needs to eat sensibly for most of the time and not revert to the old ways when Baggy and Calum would have a cream-slice, a custard-slice and a doughnut before their pudding!! This was pretty much every weekend too. No more. But it's Calum's birthday this weekend, so Baggy is taking him out for an Indian meal with two of their friends. She might be pushing her luck but she will be indulging in all her favourites: lamb passanda, onion bargees, Pashwari naan,  poppadums and dips. Clever Bird will get her to drive though, at least that way Baggy will not have a drink. She might need to search out a vertical hill on Sunday though.......

Distinct lack of motivation in the Baggy household at the moment.

Gloria Gardener is rather upset that all her pink hyacinths have snapped off. Their heads are so big that they must just be top heavy. As a result they are now in the house as The Domestic Goddess has put them in one of Archaeologist Annie's art deco vases. The room now smells wonderful. Baggy is struggling to get the gang motivated at the moment. It's so cold again. The fire is going (rather pathetically truth be told) although Clara wants to say it's blazing. But not much is getting done. Baggy has been to town to get a few things sorted including a visit to the library. She wasn't actually sure that her library card would even work as she has never withdrawn a book before but it did. So she's now armed with the Writers' & Artists' Yearbook 2015 to try to figure out what if anything to do with her novel, if and when she finishes it. Typing up her scribbles to date is proving to be very slow. It's made Clever Bird realise  just how long the other book that Creative Clara wrote a while ago actually is! Perhaps she should let someone read that one. Anyway, in the meantime, all the things the gang should be doing are not getting done.

Lack of motivation combined with lack of energy are causing havoc with Baggy. Mind you what kind of normal person is motivated to do housework? The Domestic Goddess certainly is not. She does however have the technician coming tomorrow to fix the chair that has had no legs since it was delivered three weeks ago. Clever Bird just hopes that they do fix it as the only people who can sit on it at the moment are the Minis and Hinge and Bracket.

But she really does need to try to reclaim some of the sitting room before he comes as it's looking a total mess again! But Creative Clara is the only one who fancies doing anything, so she keeps side-tracking everyone else. Bracket is obviously feeling neglected as wherever Furry Mama sits, she follows. She is currently nestled next to Baggy on the sofa having relocated from the dining table where Clara had been typing her novel. No she should not be on the dining table (Calum would have a fit) but she looked so cute lying on top of Clara's notebook. If Baggy removes this laptop from her lap, Bracket will be on it in a flash! Bless her. Minty Mutt is fast asleep having taken Furry Mama on another marathon-walk this morning. Baggy wishes she was too. No idea why she is so tired but she is. The really annoying thing is that the chair technician chap will be coming when Baggy is supposed to be at Fat Club - why does that always happen? It might be doing Baggy a favour though if she can't go, as if she hasn't put weight on this week it will be a miracle..........

Day 4 - Funny old day.

Funny old day today. Spring has sprung off somewhere and winter has reappeared in little old Suffolk. It is cold, wet and windy with the odd bit of hail thrown in for good measure. Of course Clever Bird failed to pay too much attention to this when Furry Mama took Minty Mutt for his walk. Fortunately she didn't get Baggy too soaked. When they got home The Domestic Goddess decided that she needed to light the fire before it got any colder.

Creative Clara decided that today she was in charge. Novel writing was to be the priority of the day. Or rather typing up what she has hand-written so far. Actually a big job. But it means that she can re-read what she has written to date before carrying on with the journey. Except just as she got started Baggy had a phone call from her solicitor telling her that she needed to sort out insurance on the house that she is inheriting. Clever Bird had no idea how complicated getting landlord insurance would be. Over two hours later she had finally sorted it. Very expensive! Then The Goddess had to rustle up some lunch as it was gone two and Baggy had eaten nothing.

Finally Clara started typing. But as Baggy is falling apart at the seams, she has decided to stop for a while as her back was hurting. Except that of course Clever Bird reminded her that she had not written her blog either. So now she is typing this. It's easier on this laptop though. Tea required.

Grotty Groom was going to go and see the Boys this afternoon, but the weather is so horrible that Hormonal Hannah is keeping Baggy from going out. Probably wise because Baggy is very achy today without getting cold too. So one way and another it has turned into a funny old day........

Day 3 - The Goddess really does try SO hard!

Despite appearances and rumours to the contrary, The Domestic Goddess really does try quite hard to keep on top of things in Baggy's little house. Today, although she tweeted to the contrary, Creative Clara is not writing (well she wasn't anyway - yeah Clever Bird knows that she is now, but she wasn't, so let's not be pedantic bloggees please), Baggy had set The Goddess tasks! But between the house and the chaos, absolutely every single task ends up being a drama! Take today for instance. First task wash some clothes. Easy-peasy right? No not right. Wash them. Take them out of the machine to realise that thanks to The Goddess  having stupidly let Grotty Groom stick one of Joey's saddle cloths in previously, the new washing is covered in horse hair. Re-rinse the clothes. Take them outside to hang them in the spring sunshine. Easy-peasy right? No not right. The spinny clothes-drier thingy just keeps falling over because it is only in soft (soggy after the storms) soil, not in a proper holder. Clever Bird managed to prop it up with two sticks only for the wind to catch it and it land on Baggy's head - with, of course, all the clothes The Goddess had actually pegged up now dangling in the wet grass.

Wash more clothes. Go out to hang them up. Put them on the wrong side of the drier. Repeat performance of collapse and knock Baggy on the head! Attempt to re-stick it up with sticks. Next task put all the clothes that have been sitting in the bathroom waiting to be put away for a week, away. Easy-peasy right? No not right. Baggy and Calum have way more clothes than wardrobe or drawer space. There is nowhere to put them. Hence why they sit in the bathroom for so long. Give up, make piles of clean clothes in the bedrooms - only for a cat to go and sit on the pile and knock the lot over.

Next task, do last night's washing up. Firstly make enough space to be able to - put away the deep fat fryer that has been sitting on the tiny, teeny-weeny, miniscule work surface since before Baggy and Calum went to Kent. It goes in an overhead cupboard, with way too much stuff in it - manage to knock a glass out of it which smashes on the floor. Glass absolutely everywhere. Both Hinge and Minty Mutt come to investigate. Furry Mama tries to keep them out of the way while The Goddess sweeps up the mess.

Next task put some boxes of tiles that they brought back from Baggy's sister's in the shed. Easy-peasy right? No not right. They can't be heavy because Debby lifted them just as easily as Calum did. But Baggy struggled. Just about got one box to the shed without dropping it, only to realise that there is absolutely no room in the shed. The remaining three large boxes are therefore sitting on the floor by the dining table meaning that they are completely in the way and the sitting room as usual looks a total mess. The Goddess as per usual has now given up and Clara has taken Baggy over. But seriously, can you blame her bloggees?..............