Time for a reality check - is Baggy recovered yet?

Okay bloggees, as this is supposed to be an honest account of Baggy's road to recovery, let's get Creative Clara to say it like it is. It is now ten months since Baggy's Lawrence-the-durmoid-cyst surgery and nine months since the surgery on her right arm. More than enough time for Baggy to be 100% back to normal right? Wrong. Obviously the first lot of surgery was "major". The second lot - not so much - however Clever Bird forgot two things when she wanted Baggy to have both surgeries so close together. Firstly, it took her six months to recover from the same cubital tunnel surgery on her left arm (a year previously), and that wasn't a full recovery, just enough for her to be able to ride and do the horses again. But Grotty Groom went back too soon and gave Baggy pneumonia! So bearing in mind that Baggy is right-handed, it is hardly surprising that her right arm is still not totally back to normal (if it ever will be). Secondly, the body can only cope with so much trauma and will focus on the "worst" thing first. So the arm surgery detracted from Baggy's body sorting out her major stomach surgery. Additionally, it also meant that Baggy had three lots of general anaesthetic in under twelve months! A lot to take for any body, let alone an old one like Baggy's. Then of course, just three weeks after her arm surgery (in Christmas week), Baggy's stepmother died and Baggy's demons were released and she started to unravel. But the total tipping point for Baggy was Grotty Groom not being able to see her horses, because Baggy just couldn't cope with the people she had to deal with there. As her horse Wesley, literally keeps Baggy sane, this was the last straw. Hormonal Hannah began to dominate the gang totally and Clever Bird realised two things: the menopause was affecting Baggy dramatically (having had everything including both ovaries whipped out with Lawrence), and Baggy had slipped into depression.

So Baggy has taken action. She's now on HRT (Hormone Replacement Therapy). Truthfully, Clever Bird is unsure whether this has helped much, other than to have reduced the frequency and intensity of Hormonal Hannah's hot flushes. She has attended the Stress Management course, which just confirmed that she did know how to deal with stuff, as long as she remembered to do it before it overwhelms her. She is having counselling, that awful though it is, certainly seems to be helping. And she has looked after the horses again - admittedly only once, but still, it's a start. This week Baggy is going back to see the Doctor, because Clever Bird has finally admitted that perhaps Baggy's counsellor and Doctor are right and she should think about going on anti-depressants.

But the fact is that Baggy's overwhelming feeling at the moment is one of guilt. Guilt that Grotty isn't back at work being uppermost. Guilt therefore, that it is costing a small fortune to have the horses looked after. Guilt, guilt, guilt. However, as Calum pointed out, he watches Baggy doing things on a day-to-day basis and he can see that she is not back to normal. (Whatever normal is for Baggy!) Even Clever Bird is well aware that Baggy frequently grabs her stomach when she is lifting, or twists suddenly, because it hurts. She knows that Baggy cannot lift things that she lifted easily before. She also knows that she cannot even stand up or sit down onto the sofa as easily as she used to - thanks to no real stomach strength any more, because her abs were cut through. But even Clever Bird got a shock just now, when she watched The Domestic Goddess struggling to open a can of salmon; trying to twist the stiff can opener had Baggy's elbow burning. So Clever Bird is trying to get Freda Fretter and Hormonal Hannah to back off a bit and has come up with a better plan. Instead of the all-or-nothing approach that Grotty has, Clever Bird is going to get her to build her work up. So starting next week, Grotty will look after the horses for two days, but even then she won't do everything. She'll have them turned out in the morning, then head up later in the day to muck out etc before bringing them in. Just one trip to the yard instead of two a day (saving an hour) and just two walks to the paddocks a day, instead of four, saving another thirty minutes. Instead of focussing on how much extra the horses are costing, she'll focus on the amount that she's beginning to "save". Little steps!

Meanwhile, The Goddess is helping out Furry Mama. Is it possible bloggees that Minty Mutt has too many toys?

 

And of course "F" is for Fat Club, well yes, and Friday, and today was the day. The good news is that in spite of Baggy having a fairly stressful week (understatement), she was determined not to make herself feel even more miserable by comfort-eating and piling on more weight! She succeeded! She has lost the three pounds that she put on last week..........