1) The Domestic Goddess decided to hard boil a few eggs to snack on and for Baggy to have with her dressed crab for lunch. She put the pan of water on to boil. Hormonal Hannah made her totally forget it. Clever Bird realised about half-an-hour later that the water was still boiling - only of course, it wasn't! The base of the pan is now black. Fortunately the (otherwise useless) hob, must have a safety device in it and it had switched off before the pan started to melt. This is not the first time that Hannah has caused this particular situation - last time it was peas.
2) Creative Clara had another order from her little Etsy shop, Realuv yesterday, so she got Furry Mama to delay Minty Mutt's walk until the village, pop-up Post Office was open today. Two birds, one stone and all that. It opens for two hours at 1.30pm, so Furry Mama set off at 1.30pm with Creative Clara's neatly wrapped, tiny, parcel in her hand. As she walked around the village football pitch, to the village hall, she began to doubt herself. Hannah was muttering at Baggy, "Well I checked it was open on Monday from 1.30 to 3.30." No sign of lights on. "It is Monday isn't it?" No sign of a car. "It must be Monday, Calum went to work at silly o'clock". No Post Office sign stuck in the pop-up holder. "Maybe I'm going nuts". Minty did a poo. As Furry Mama got the bags out of Baggy's jacket pocket, the phone fell out. Clever Bird checked the time, "12.38pm". "Yes well done Hannah, Clever Bird did remind you the clock hadn't been adjusted". "Mind you Clever Bird, you idiot, you were the one wondering why your lunchtime soaps weren't on as Furry Mama left the house". Sigh. So Furry Mama carried the little parcel, all the way round Minty's walk.
3) Furry Mama needed to lift Minty's bottom, to help him get over the stile. She put the little parcel on top of the post. Mint hopped over, Baggy hobbled over. It's a beautiful autumn day again. They ambled along enjoying the gentle sun. As Furry Mama bent down to put Mint's lead back on as they approached the road, Clever Bird realised that she had no parcel! They walked the half mile back to the stile, where Hormonal Hannah had left it.
4) Once home again, Furry Mama realised that Hannah had made her forget to give Mint his daily painkiller - no wonder he couldn't get over the stile. Then Clever Bird realised that she'd also made her forget to take yesterdays' HRT pill, and this morning's happy pill. Sigh.
5) Clara watched her soaps and set off once again for the pop-up Post Office. Furry Mama tagged along as it seemed silly to leave Mint at home. They were only halfway up the road when Clever Bird realised that Hannah had made her forget to bring any money to pay for the postage. Third time "lucky", the parcel went off.
And so the day goes on. That woman has a lot to answer for.........
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