The appointment was on time. A small miracle. All the usual questions were fired at Clever Bird. Name, age, allergies, op. date, which arm? etc. Then, "I see you have just had major surgery", "Yes", "And how are you?", "Well, I'm great. But they did discover a heart arrhythmia so I've just had a 24-hour ECG. The results are due today". "Oh. In that case I'm afraid that we can't operate". "No! Why?", "I'm afraid we cannot operate if there's an on-going investigation". "But the results are due today and I've already been referred to the Heart Unit at this hospital, couldn't you check?", "No. It will have to go back to your GP, then once he has the results and/or you are declared okay, he'll have to refer you back to us", "But, that could take weeks", "Well, yes about three to four months". Boom, boomedy, boomedy, boomy, boom, boom. Cue hot flush and total meltdown. Baggy tried very hard not to, but burst into tears. "I'm so sorry to have wasted your time, but........", Clever Bird explained why it was so important for Baggy to try to have just one recovery time from the Lawrence-the-durmoid surgery and the cubital tunnel surgery. The need to rob a bank was mentioned. Freda felt ridiculously guilty. Baggy just felt hopeless. Calum was amazingly supportive. Clever Bird asked whether there was any way that the Nurse could at least check where in the system Baggy's referral was. By now, the very senior Nurse, who had looked like your typical stern Matron, was beginning to feel rather sorry for Baggy who was still in meltdown mode. "Well, no I can't, I'm afraid and under the circumstances I'm sorry but I'll have to cancel your surgery". "Do you think perhaps I could find out if we go to the Cardiology Unit", asked Clever Bird. "Well, there's no harm in trying. Here let me show you the way".
More tears. But Baggy decided positive action was required, so she toddled Clever Bird and Freda (totally out of control) Fretter to the Cardiology Clinic. They kindly checked, but could find no referral letter on the system. Clever Bird, egged on by a now totally hysterical Freda decided to have one last try and went and found the Heart Unit. Freda attempted to explain to the receptionist, while feeling completely breathless and dizzy from the boomedy, boomedy, boom, booming Baggy's heart was doing, as if to make its point! This receptionist also couldn't find a referral but because she could see how stressed Baggy was and the whiter-shade-of-pale that she'd turned, she offered to speak to the appointments secretaries and get back to Clever Bird as soon as she could.
On leaving the hospital Baggy went in to a proper shaky meltdown, viewing another three to four months wait for the cubital tunnel surgery. That would be just as she could have got Grotty Groom back to work and riding Wesley, regardless of whether Baggy's dodgy ticker turned out to be an issue or not. Calum was reassuring and lovely as always, but by now Freda had lost the plot through a combination of worry, guilt and disappointment. Then as Calum drove Baggy home, numbness took over from the tears. As one of Freda's biggest worries is the cost of having the horses looked after whilst Grotty Groom can't do it, Clever Bird suggested that now that it could be over nine months before Hairy Biker Hen could even consider getting back on her bike, perhaps Baggy should sell it. So Calum suggested we pop into the motorbike dealership to see what the options were.
Just as we were discussing the options for selling the bike, Baggy got a phone call. It was the receptionist from the Heart Unit. They had phoned Baggy's GP and had it confirmed that the results of the 24-hour ECG showed that, "No further action was required". Really? That is brilliant. Phew! Boom, boomedy, boomedy, boom, silence, boom, boom, boom. Cue hot flush. Wow! So, presumably, although dodgy, Baggy's heart is not dodgy enough to need treatment. Yay! Well, as Clever Bird pointed out it has been like this for as long as Baggy can remember, just not anywhere near as frequently as it's been lately. Stress. Thanks for nothing Freda!
So, Clever Bird kicked Freda in to action. Phone call to the Orthopaedic Clinic to see if she could rescue Baggy's operation slot. Phone call to the GP to get them to fax the ECG "No action needed" letter to the Consultant. Further phone call back to Baggy to say that she could still have her operation on 3rd December, but she would have to come back in on Thursday afternoon to finish off the assessment that she should have had this morning. No worries, Baggy lives at Ipswich hospital. Well done Clever Bird and Freda. Hairy Biker Hen, don't panic, you can keep your motorbike!
Now, the surgery that Baggy was terrified of having a few months back (to the point that she turned it down, even though she knows what it's like, having had the same operation on her left arm a year ago), she can't wait to have. She'll still be scared, but it makes so much more sense to overlap the two recovery periods and frankly, compared to the surgery she's just had, it's nothing!
Once home, Baggy felt so relieved and so positive, that she decided to let Furry Mama take Minty Mutt out for a walk, without Calum to hold the lead. Things are looking up..........
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